我们从小到大,常听过的话一定是“你还年轻,没有经历过社会,很多东西你都不懂,想法太幼稚,思想不够成熟”,每次听到这种话我都有一种冲动,试图用一些例子来反驳,证明自己已经成熟。直到最近,我才突然意识到,这一切的很多逻辑都是错的。正是因为没有理解好这句话背后的逻辑,导致了我们自己、包括父母辈层出不穷的失败教育,大量三四线城市的孩子沦为学校教育的炮灰,“从小输给一线城市孩子的距离大约可绕地球一圈”,这些孩子“开心快乐”的朝着“无产阶级”的目标越走越远。
名词假设:
“无产阶级”:我这里用调侃的语气,泛指那些生活潦倒、思想固化、不思进取的人。
“成熟”:我这里形容一个人在某个领域有一些特殊的经历,有自己的思考。
“成功”:我这里形容一个人有一定的社会地位,日子过比大多数人要好。
“上升”:我这里形容学习更高纬度的知识和经验,忽略当前不懂的比较浅的知识和经验。
“下沉”:我这里形容停下来把当前不足的知识和经验完善好,再学习其他的知识和经验。
正文:
当“你还年轻”“没有经历过社会”“想法太幼稚”的话出现时?其真实的意思是什么?
真实意思是:你根本不了解我所经历的,不了解我的行业,不“成熟”,等你“成熟”了再来谈这个吧!!!
首先,这句话出现了一个很大的逻辑漏洞,没有讲成熟的定义,没有定义什么样才叫成熟,不像我上文对“成熟”有一个假设前提。因此大概率听到的人,会根据讲话人的身份来自己定义成熟的领域和含义。
其次,这是一种否定,然后是带有一种目的性的引导,试图吸引你的兴趣,让你去了解那些你不知道,但对方知道的东西。
其实,大部分这句话出现的语境里,在没有假设的情况下是隐含了一个成熟的假设前提,它的大概意思是“经历过社会的磨难、社会的艰苦、社会的残酷、社会的阴暗”叫做成熟。
那么这句话的可怕之处就呈现出来了,在讲它之前我们先更正另一个逻辑错误:
从逻辑关系上,“有过一些社会的磨难和残酷” >>(能够) “人生更成功吗”?错!!!(论证1)
这个逻辑关系是不成立的,而正确的逻辑是:“有过一些社会的磨难和残酷” >>(能够) “下次遇到社会的磨难和残酷时能更坚强的活下去”(论证2)(过于简单,不再论证)。
为什么呢?很简单,我们见过的那些家庭环境很困难的孩子更“成功”了,还是家庭环境好的更“成功”了?我们见过的有惨痛经历的人“成功”的多,还是从小没有惨痛经历的“成功”的多?
所以,想要更“成功”,就应该尽量避免和规避那些困难和苦难,而不是迎“难”而上,除非跟亲情、爱情、友情等有关的我们迫不得已要去面对,或有别样的人生追求要自己去体验,否则,还是不建议我们主动去经历磨难,因为它并不会让我们人生更“成功”!!
下面来讲一下这句话可怕的地方:
这句话经常出现在那些不谨慎的家长的口中之后会有什么结果呢?“你还年轻”“没有经历过社会”“想法太幼稚”,这些话一旦出现在孩子的耳中,因为没有给出“成熟”的定义,所以我猜测他们心里会默默做一个成熟的定义:“我要成熟,我要经历社会,我要经历一些社会的阴暗面才能更加成熟”。
那么,读书是否能让我更加成熟呢?不能!!!
那么,做一个好孩子能让我更加成熟吗?不能!!!
那么,我去接触、经历一些社会更阴暗的事情,能让我成熟嘛?可以
那么,我去接触一些社会更阴暗的人,能让我成熟嘛?肯定可以
那么,我学大人一样直接辍学打工赚钱,能让我更成熟嘛?绝对可以
以上分析完毕,那么我们再从听者的角度来分析判断这个问题。
当别人说我们“不成熟”的时候,我们应该上升还是下沉?
(5.31号待完善)
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